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There was something hauntingly beautiful,  but also a terribly melancholy in the Tango music and dance. As I watched I was consumed with their pain through a dance of  intertwined beings , as the violin music rippling echoes in the grand hall. If I could dance away any pain would this heal the past for everyone – as I watched each dancer in their union - Deeply, intensely and passionately the room was swallowed into one heartbeat the one of sorrow.

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A man walked towards me at the start of the new dance and help his hand out probing me to join him. Reluctantly I agreed as he said just follow no need to know.

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Hesitantly I just clumsily moved, getting swooped around feet in the wrong place, arms stiff and stopping a few times.

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“ Just feel the  passion to dance to tango  -this is  a loveless dance.’

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“How can a beautiful art be so loveless.” I asked

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‘if you really must learn Tango then do as your told first , in Tango it’s the man that leads so follow’ he said trying to guide me and I thought are all Argentinian men macho control freaks!

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‘Do you come here every week ‘ I asked cheesy but I was trying to not feel awkward

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He had the typical jet black wet Argentinian hair with a near orange Essex tan but his attire gave him stature.

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‘I come weekly ever since I can remember -Its part of my Argentinian soul’ he smiled leading as I tried desperately to focus one foot after the other. Everyone made it look so easy but I was concerned about toppling over after every turn I just shuffled along awkwardly.

 

I obviously dashed to the side table, once the dance was over, thanking him nervously and continued watching after my terrible debacle of a dance.Still mesmerised as I watched the grace of a lady press her cheek  to the face of her dancer  – she danced with closed eyes as if in pain, as if dancing her suffering away , not missing a step or move always aware of her space and actions , but still eyes wide shut. Perhaps Tango really was healing for so many Argentinians.

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Women stood watching on the side of the great hall , those standing watching those dancing and  waiting to be asked. I was a by stander, holding my glass of coke in my  hand. Unlike the other ladies I was avoiding being asked to dance again while others waited eagerly. Some couples dominated, as they danced in dramatic twirls round the dance floor, while others flowed in subtle fluidity along with the violin as if the air lifted them along. This was not the Tango you see off strictly come dancing, or the Tango shows out performed for tourist. It was the real classic underground Tango you come to Argentina that must be seen.

 

At the back of the dance hall a class was due to start.

 

So something I can tell you about Tango its not easy!

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The teacher Gabriella, a professional 5 time champion Tango dancer, explained a little about her background and what Tango was all about. Being the national dance of the country you can join one of these classes at the many salon halls in the major cities in Argentina.

 

Gabriella gave a brief 8 step starter dance movements mimicking the figure of eight or Ocho – this  is the oldest classic move with a combination of side steps and turns and slides - it took a while as a few of us tourists made many attempt to follow. The group of 5 of us , all tourists of course, were eager to learn and after a short 30min class i got disheartened I decided I needed a one to one.

 

I decided to have a private lesson with Gabriella, the Tango champion at her home– perhaps with a full few hours I could master it better and say I’m a Tango expert.

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She lived in the north part of the city in a beautiful apartment with memorabilia and tournament pictures of her victories and Tango shows performances.

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‘What do you do as a job?’ she questioned

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‘Oh well I work in the city in IT in London and ..’

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‘Ahhh she said now I know why your timing is out of synch,  your trying to think your way through Tango. Stop thinking feel and try and use your motion. ‘ she kept reminding me .

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Easy for her to say the only bit of dancing I really did was Friday nights in a city bar Abacus in Bank after work which was just rally jumping up and down with no rhythm.

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After my intense lesson I was convinced this was not a going to be a quick win mastery, it needed  time and patience to craft it. I wasn’t really planning to spend my valuable free hours in Buenos Aires mastering Tango.

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Gabriella made me tea and offered I sit her balcony overlooked the city another protest below could be seen as locals marched along the parade chanting something.

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‘The government corruption never ends’ she complained

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‘These days models are Tango dancers -they are the new stars of Tango not us classic dancers. They dance with presidents and societies rich and famous at their grand parties’

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‘But Tango is an art not anyone can just brush lipstick and try even I know that’ I exclaimed

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Gabriella explained how the government, specifically the president, enjoyed a lifestyle far beyond what any local Argentinian could live by. The president’s family spent thousands on luxury goods and events. He loved celebrities and would often be seen by the paparazzi entertaining famouse actresses to dance Tango at his personal parties – often cancelling important official events for social.

 

‘People have no choice but to protest or riot – the countries middle class now have to maintain basic living standard with two jobs and unemployment is higher than ever’

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Gabriella’s income was helped with tourist - Tango tourism helped her and the country keep on its pivot.

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Another friend I met in my second week in Buenos Aires was Lucy, a  Danish girl, who spent all her time frantically revising after her intense Spanish lessons. Lucy was using her time in Buenos Aires to learn Spanish before her Latin America travels. Feeling slightly guilty as I was careless indulging in just enjoying Buenos Aires  with my time, I also felt like the last thing I needed was pressure to study. I wanted to take my time and just enjoy being here .

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I was enjoying the slow pace of immersing myself in the city as Simone Weil, French Philosopher , Speed is the enemy of attention – velocity is something that can drain the soul’

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So another tip is if you have the time Good travel is slow travel. Loiter and Linger and see the world through slow eyes.

One lazy afternoon I convinced Lucy, to take a break from Spanish lessons, and join me shopping - little did I know our hostel was 5min walk from the official Harrods of Argentina.

 

Who would have thought one of the worlds most iconic department stores would be in Buenos Aires. It dates  back in 1914 when Buenos Aires was one of wealthiest cities in the world. As the UK Harrods , this store boasts decadence inside and out and still flourishing even though Argentina was suffering perils of economic downturn.

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Through my travels I learnt the characters you meet and places you go are experiences rather than collection of things. Going solo was part of my manifesto, the best way to learn about you and meet new people.

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My first night at the hostel ,while checking emails and updating my Facebook travel blog,  a 6 ft 2 Canadian plumber called Mark, sat next to me and  started chatting. That’s the thing about being a solo traveller, everyone wants to share the experience and meet others too.

He came every year for  a month to Buenos Aires, that’s how much he loved it, often doing similar things, or just immersing in the  city and learning something new each time with his short bursts of leave.

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“The sights, the smells and sounds of Buenos Aires all leave a lasting memory that became a lifelong love affair of this city I want to return to over again and again.” he spoke of the place as if it was the love of his life.Can a person fall in love with a place?

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I joined him and a few Irish girls in the courtyard and mingling with new comers to the hostel. Its here I learnt stories of what people had seen, what to be careful of, where the best steak could be eaten and it was better than a TripAdvisor question board. It was a live stream of travellers experiences where I soaked in tips on what not to or what to do, which  would help me on my way. Everyone had different accounts of the capital,  but for what ever personal reason people travel, however it was certain they all fall in love with Buenos Aires

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A few of us ventured out to the local bar area of Recoleta. Buenos Aires on a Friday was buzzing. We ended up in Hiphop club would you believe in Buenos Airs – there something for everyone here – I loved it. The city is gritty, hip and alive with acres of natural land or acres of just urban sprawls of streets.

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As well as explore the city in the day the night life is like no other in Buenos Aires. You had your House club Pacha, rock to jazz or even the local bars had  great night spots to hang out. Like any international capital it was like being in Europe so I got my month long fix of partying and craziness all in a few weeks.

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The first week was great, I also befriended Caroline, a history of art student, also a solo traveller from LA and we bonded instantly. She joined me on my loitering round the city. Caroline was a perfect companion to explore galleries and historical monuments of the city, since she had the backdrop story’s and like a Wikipedia at hand my very own tour guide on history, politics, and culture.

Caroline and I particularly enjoyed strolling the neighbourhoods of Palmero, San Telmo with its buzz, endless murals or street paintings to marvel at.

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But as with traveling after her one week stint was done she went onto her next destination to leave me still not ready to move on. This is the part of traveling alone I both loved and hated- you made friends then you parted. What I was surprised about was being a solo female traveller was not a novelty, so many other fearless travellers explored alone , of course your  never really  alone since there’s always someone new to meet if you liked it or not.

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What was I doing then with my time in Argentina after 3 weeks of doing everything I guess one should  do. I’d been rushing all my life, in London rushing to get the  bus, or train on time, rushing to get to meetings on time, rushing through lunch at my desk and rushing getting Friday nights over, rushing  my drinks down me  and then to spend weekend recovering to do the whole week over again and again and gain.

 

Being in Buenos Aires everything felt out of sync and nothing was being rushed the way I wanted it to be. Taking time doing everything differently enjoying sitting at the coffee shops like Argentinians do, taking time sipping tiny cups of coffee and eating  empanadas -  for the first time I could hear myself think and see moments and things I would not normally notice around me.

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I got used to falling asleep in a shared dorm at the hostel with people coming in out and the weather and busy days and night left me slumbering through the interruption at night as people arrived late.

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So something else I can teach you about Argentina – Its possible to eat many steaks in one day.

Ok so the steak and Malbec is the best in Argentina,  the best you have ever had - im sure you have heard that before. But there is something about the texture and freshness and for non meat eaters I truly cannot convince you unless you try it.

While at the hostel, most savvy broke backpackers would opt with cooking their own steak , which I joined in a few times- trust me any supermarket here sells the best quality steak you have ever had. But my experiences started at restaurants with steaks the size of your face covered in peppered sauce was like a divine awakening.

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Wine was as cheep as water, whether Malbec, Pino noir or any local range and going for red is a great side to your steak- mostly I forgot about sides why be healthy when the steak is so good. Now this was me a while back before my Veganism back in 2007, but really im so glad I didn’t even attempt to go healthy- when in Rome. Even the corner café down from the hostel served probably the best steak sandwich  I had ever tried.

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It’s really not hard to find a good steak in Buenos Aires some of the best places  include La Carniceria, Don Julio Parrilla, Parrilla Cero5 or any at your hotel/hostel, supermarket or café. Also  don’t be afraid to go Jugosa (medium rare) or a punto (medium) make the most of the succulent heavenly steak you have ever had.

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Recoleta

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So another top 10 thing to do in Buenos Aires is explore the district of Recoleta but most immortally visit its famouse cemetery. Back in London local cemeteries are everywhere, like a local sanctuary and I’m often drawn to them for the peace in the hustle and bustle of a city – not because dead people are buried there.

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Recoleta cemetery is one of the most famouse cemeteries in Argentina, it contains graves of famouse nobility, military or just ordinary people that had lived extraordinary lives. Originally the cemetery was built in the 18th century  around a convent. Then the garden was converted to one of the first cemeteries in the whole of Argentina. Recoleta cemetery shows you how its celebrates, oligarchs  and societies rich rested after death. Here the countries founding fathers and socialites all lay here in this magnificent architectural splendour.

 

As you walk in through the neo classical gates the cemetery has around 5000 vaults and the style inside is a mix of neo classical, baroque, gothic or art deco all mixed -not one theme runs through it. The main walk way that runs through the cemetery, lined with trees branching over. Many of the coffins are in full view for you to see for people to lay wreath and pay respects. You see here rows of burials as if like a bookstore instead of books life on shelves full of stories each life resting in its place with an extraordinary story for you to learn.

Having only used travel guides I was prepared to look out for Eva Peron who was the famouse Evita. Enemies of life lay side by side here in their final journey such as President Aramburu who played a part in Evita’s body abduction now both lay in the same place.

I loved Lilliana’s story who was killed in an Avalanche in the Alpes, on her honeymoon in a  gothic style grave. What’s more she was buried in her wedding dress in a vault constructed like her bedroom.

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Some stories of ordinary people from the gravedigger that became obsessed with the cemetery commissioned a statue of himself working in the cemetery using his life savings to be buried in these prestigious surroundings.

 

Another heart felt story was the girl who died twice called Rufina :

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Once upon a time a girl named Rufina was born to one of the richest societies in Argentina raised by her mother she was known to be beautiful and kind, as her farther who had passed when she was young.For her 18th birthday her mother organised her birthday party and that evening while she got ready for her party one of her friends revealed a dark secret. The secret involved her mother was having an affair with her fiancé -devasted by the news she collapse into a coma. After being examined she was diagnosed dead from shock. Her mother had organised a fast burel at Recoleta and Rufina’s body was placed in the coffin few days before the funeral.The cemetery guardian noticed something off hand and ordered the casket be opened to check nothing had been stolen by theifs to find scratch marks on the coffin lid- she had woken and tried to escape – after the mother was worried she commanded a statue be built in her honour.

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Both dead and the living are close akin – we think of them, visit them, talk to them and one day join them  one day. If we fear death depends on your religion or beliefs I guess, but regardless this place of peace truly is worth a visit not a reminder to our end but a celebration of those gone. Some of the monuments were huge with iron gates or full marble lining. What was more grandiose was that some of the tombs had entrances with sitting rooms where a family could come and visit the deceased in private.

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Since the cemetery is protected by walls the grounds cannot be expanded and of course therefore no room for more burials so there have known to be instances when  the current owner sells the space to be replaced by new plaques and family members.

When being in a hostel got too much, since you always had company, I would head to the grand hotel on Avenue 9 de Julio roof top bar for a  drink and luxury break I needed.  That’s the thing I was not traveling in my GAP year, saving every penny. I could pop into Harrods or go to a Michelin restaurant when I wanted, or check into a hotel when I had enough of a dorm – I just wasn’t sure how long I would be travelling so I didn’t want to blow my full budget in a month .

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The thing about solo travel is if your not used to it you  can sometimes hate or embrace or it. Of course its about forming a relationship with yourself in these new situations and learning about how you cope with new experiences alone.How you create joy and importantly building that enjoyment with yourself is a skill I learnt too– loving your own company first is key before anyone can love it.

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Your probably thinking the whole trip is a break, so really I shouldn’t be complaining about being exhausted. But travelling can get exhausting and although hostels are great for being around people it doesn’t allow one to really switch off. I remember one summer afternoon overlooking the city from the rooftop of this beautiful hotel bar I would relax with my $15  cocktail, the price of my room a night at hostel, and look down at the big naive de Julio.

 

This avenue is probably the biggest highway street with 12 lanes I have ever seen. In fact Argentinians call it the wildest road in the world, it stretches 3km with its name honouring Argentina’s independence day. As I looked down it was lined with a mix of architecture and many landmarks and monuments – peppered  with  performance artists juggling, fire-eating, traffic lights in the lanes of frenzied traffic. This highway had a buzz capturing modern Buenos Aires life all in one place for you to see. Although the avenue showcases ugliness as a stretch of urban noise it was also a powerful stimuli's every small activity as you watch from far or walk along this avenue its hard not to be impressed by this striking street of chaos.

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One hot afternoon a few of us residents at the hostel, looked out on the balcony that faced a monument it was a warm humid evening. Then someone suggest La Bomba it was a Monday evening. So we all made our way for the 8pm show. La Bomba a live drumming concert performed every Monday, with a percussion group that draws crowds from all over the city, not just tourists -but everyone of all ages. This concert held weekly performs a hypnotic mix of rhythmic sounds solely from drummers making it one of my favourite nights out in Buenos Aires. All the drummers , and that’s all it is, play an electrifying improvised performance of vibrating magic that made everyone jump. Infront of the drummers and a conductor uses a series of hand gestures to direct the band.

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La Bomba Tiempo is performed in an old warehouse building filled with crowds all in joy and peace just there for the music. A few of us went for the offers of buy and get one free (me below with my offer of drinks:)  limited choice beers/drinks and danced away surrounded by vibrating dancers and the smell of weed around. Don’t be put off its safe and not full of hippies - it’s the atmosphere you just need to go for and being part of this was an evening to remember you cant but help dance  to the drum beat. On the dot 10pm the show ends and people responsibility leave and off course those that want to party head to the afterparty bars foe more.

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In the Buenos Aires  there were not many places to escape, a city of 15million, for peace and the one place I felt at ease even back in London were my lunchtime visits to the local bookstores – which no longer exist because of Amazon. Its like my little peaceful haven - bookstores in any city.

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Well, who would have thought Buenos Aires has more bookstores per person than any city in the world.Buenos Aires has  734 bookstores – roughly 25 bookshops for every 100,000 inhabitants, that’s a lot. Maybe because Buenos Aires was the centre of a multicultural environment  of intellects from Europe – people from  everywhere came to settle it was once the wealthiest capital of the world and so the arts thrived more than anywhere.

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Additionally, till today Argentinians prefer going to a book stores, since  Amazon is still not permitted to sell there and any eBooks such as kindle unavailable due to tax charges of 20% limiting books sales online.

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This was a little secret I did not know and how delighted I was after 3 weeks of feeling slightly homesick I decide to visit, as recommended on lonely planet, El Ateneo a former theatre converted to a bookstore -  still kept its design of 1919 with beautiful Italian art draped on ceilings, theater boxes perched on the side – all the luxury elegance of a theatre visit just for me little book paradise.

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It is the most beautiful bookstore in the whole wide world I was in aww ,I felt so at peace  and I was one of the 3000 visitors a year. I managed to find the one book I would buy and climbed up onto the main stage, that has a café, of the theatre and sat at one of the cosy sofas amongst other happy readers  lost in their world of books . It was like having my own library or decadence. You can even BYOB (Bring your own book) not wine but its cosy and luxurious and just made me happy.

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In 2011, Buenos Aires received the UNESCO prize as “World Book Capital City”.For all you book lovers there are lots and lots of cosy book stores in this city,El Tempto distict has lots of stores, and there are English sections but what I loved more was buying my coffee and sitting on a cosy set surrounded by rustic books. Yes you may ask why would you go to a book store when in Buenos Aires well if you want to visit the most beautiful - its worth it and hey I have been traveling for weeks this is like a nice reset break like being in my own city at home these book stores took me back home.

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While loitering and wandering I met Mark, an economics student ,6.1  , a jawline like superman and a smile from ear to ear was loud but charming and probably one of the funniest people I had ever met. He had been living in Buenos Aires for a year in his university internship and was fully fluent in Spanish. He endearingly mocked my lack of travel preparation actually most people at the hostel had a plan I was just drifting with no next steps I liked my slow pace.

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Being out with Mark when he could get away from his classes was like being far away but with an old friend to be at ease with. I loved getting mini history or cultural  lesson of Argentina and Argentinians. His sheer optimism on every topic whether a story of his time back in Jersey NY or events in Buenos Aires – he had lots to talk about and I loved listening while walking the city with him. If it wasn’t for him my Spanish would still be at Ola for the rest of my trip so I learnt the basics without having to be stuck in a classroom for now.

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Mark was stunned I wanted to go Patagonia with no preparations still with my summer clothes from Cuba, so I needed to shop. Walking with him round the city was fun since he knew it with the back of his hand introducing me to the best local restaurants, where I had the best meals of my life and walking to all the local streets and districts not in my lonely planet guide. He would always ask the staff to pack food and as he would walk me to my hostel, one of the many passing street children  would ask do you love pizza and hand them the box.

 

Mark was wonderful company and since he was a student in Buenos Aires he wasn’t like the other travellers he was a consistent friend that didn’t leave to travel elsewhere so he was like my touchpoint all my time in this city alone. On our last evening he walked me back. At my door we faced each other he gave he a warm last hug I still have an image of him saying good bye and stay safe and knowing it would be the last – again you sense im not getting the hang of making friends and parting but that’s the bliss your encounters are shaping your identity and change is key in moving on.

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The thing about Buenos Aires a city of 13million people whether you meet friends or not it’s a place you feel instantly at home in – its like the city had opened its arms to me and sang its praise for me to come explore.

After three weeks of getting to know Buenos Ares it  became my home -  in my hostel people came and went and just the staff stayed the same who I got to know them all. I loved the spontaneous nature of anything possible and free not tried down as we are in our normal day to day life preparing for the next day of work. I guess that’s what I loved so far I had not planned anything or anticipated anything having no expectations of my trip so far meant I was not disappointed. Also I didn’t want routine or a rigid itinerary I was traveling alone at my timeclock – this is what was allowing for serendipity.

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However after the three weeks I started to feel like I was traveling through time with no ambition to find the next attraction to see or great district to explore or just sit by my favourite fountain in the sun watching the world go by over and over again. Buenos Aires was both slow and fast. It has that modern European feel but also architecturally your surrounded by the old world – the diversity is a result of its immigration history.

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I was ready to move to the next part of my trip -  I was getting complacent in Buenos Aires as if a local now living day to day. I really needed to learn how to enjoy the moment which meant surprises may be good or bad, but essentially savouring that moment I was in – learning to find joy instead of frantically planning and scheduling and being on time.

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"Buenos Aires is a city which will win your heart, and once you visit you'll never want to leave."

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I think I happened to lose myself in a good way exploring Buenos Aires perhaps that why I stayed so long. Buenos Aires allowed me to disappear in a place as if I lived a full lifetime without feeling the need to leave. There are so many mysteries that yet you can discover if it’s the local nature reserves or the city majestic architecture and culture –  a city with its own sense of identity like no other. Maybe its mix of historic cultures allowed it to have a wonderful development of literature, music, art and history. A city and country once seating the richest grandeur shown off in the Beaux de arts. Then a country and city also fallen from dictatorships and economic downturn has left many with less hope but anger -yet still so much pride sits in their psyche. I did find Buenos Aires complex only through understanding its history and people do you learn how a place has imperfections but still perfect and beautiful that I will never forget.

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It was now my time to leave the city and go once I got my fill of Buenos Aires I was ready to move after watching and hearing people coming and going and really embracing the adventure I now wanted to see more I had decided I would keep traveling with no end date or final destination. I hadn’t yet missed home or had that critic voice inside tell me I need to get back and get to normality hence why I avoided calling home. This was my time to explore so Patagonia was my next destination all I knew it was cold , so I had shopped for essential woollies and my travel book to guide me through it.

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"The lasting impression that Buenos Aires leaves on anyone who has lived here is one of affection. It’s a city where anyone (whether local or not) can garner friendships."

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Top things to do in Buenos Aires

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Football- why not watch a match at famouse Boca Juniors stadium

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Recoleta- a modern fun town to explore sheik restaurant and bars and famouse cemetery Evita and the greats of Argentina lie.

 

Tango-Admire one of the many glitzy shows or attend your very own classic class at a local milongas  hall.

 

Food- try the best steak in the world at one of many Parrillas(steakhouse) or best wine from the south-Buenos Aires  restaurant guide: Pick Up The Fork - A Serious Eater's Guide to Buenos Aires and Beyond

 

Museums - 10 Best Museums To Visit in Buenos Aires | Condé Nast Traveler (cntraveler.com)

 

Plaza De Mayo just to people watch in the historical city center -try a bike tour from here

 

City Guide : Official English Website for the City of Buenos Aires

 

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Nature Trips : Jardon de botanical, Jardon Japones, Palermo Park, Prana River

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Iguazu Falls – take a 2 day trip to see one of the planet's most awe-inspiring sights, the Iguazu Falls are simply astounding

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Monday night at La bomba a must to see drummers perform the best live music.

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The city of art multiple museums for you to choose from form modern, classic or street graffiti décor.

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Recoleta – Either just go to soak up the buzz of the area full of bars and restaurants or a must see the cemetery.

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